


The Thorki Dictionary

by luceat_lux_vestra



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Feels, Fluff and Angst, Inspired by Novel, M/M, Non-Linear Narrative, POV First Person
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-09
Updated: 2015-11-22
Packaged: 2018-04-30 18:49:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5175542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luceat_lux_vestra/pseuds/luceat_lux_vestra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>APOTHEOSIS<br/>a·po·the·o·sis (n.)</p>
<p>"And in these moments, both carnal and chaste in their nature, I know that you would never doubt my love for you.</p>
<p>After all, even gods can be brought to their knees when confronted with the object of their desires."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Apotheosis (Loki)

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by David Levithan's "A Lover's Dictionary", this multi-chapter work tells the story of Thor and Loki's relationship through dictionary entries. Unfolding in short, alphabetical, and alternating first-person anecdotes, the entries provide insight into the couple's life with each other and their circle of friends, as well as glimpses into the joys and struggles that Thor and Loki face over the course of their relationship.
> 
> My intention is to feature one key word for both Thor and Loki to expound in their perspective from each letter in the alphabet, which means you guys will read two "A" words, two "B" words, and so on until we reach the letter "Z".
> 
> Comments and constructive criticisms are much welcome as they are helpful in improving my fanfic writing skills. And because of the nature of this fic, I am open to great word suggestions, which will essentially function as prompts if certain words pop out and inspire me to imagine a scenario that fits either Thor's or Loki's point of view.
> 
> This work is unbetaed, so please forgive me for any and all mistakes.
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy this one! :)

* * *

 

  **APOTHEOSIS**

 **a · po · the · o · sis** ( **n**.)

 

* * *

 

 

Everyone I know often tells me how we both make a great power couple; that we are each two perfect halves of a magnificent whole, although I hardly ever see it that way.

 

In many respects, I can see what they mean from a purely aesthetic perspective. Individually, we possess distinctively striking features that draw so many to us like moths to a flame. And while vanity may be my private vice and default deadly sin, it has never been yours.

 

You are surprisingly low-maintenance to the point that I have to force you to stand in front of a mirror after you’ve taken a brief shower so that you could at least sustain a habit of basic grooming. I can also probably console myself with the fact that you genuinely appreciate the value of premium hair conditioner because I fear to imagine the consequences of dealing with a tangled nest of sunshine follicles.

 

But despite your stubborn ways, men and women still flock to you like bees to honey. I cannot blame them, for who could ever resist your rugged masculinity and unassuming nature? Some obsess over your long and golden blond tresses matched with a glorious full beard; others are in awe of your impeccably sculpted musculature; most everyone from social acquaintances to random strangers would swoon when you give them a passing glance with your piercing cerulean gaze.

 

To them, you are the epitome of a mythical god descended to earth. In comparison, I feel contemptible to stand next to your shining presence despite frequent assurances from our friends that I am the only one worthy of being in a relationship with the mighty Thor Odinson.

 

I feel as if I am just the moon to your sun—my presence and importance only visible to others when I am in your orbit and bathed in the glow of your light. Despite these misgivings, I have learned to mask my inner turmoil with an impenetrable veneer of nonchalance.

 

But away from prying eyes, when existence is simply reduced to you and me, you always whisper the words that give me the strength to carry on whenever I am flooded with my uncertainties.

 

And in these moments, both carnal and chaste in their nature, I know that you would never doubt my love for you.

 

After all, even gods can be brought to their knees when confronted with the object of their desires.


	2. Antithesis (Thor)

* * *

 

  **ANTITHESIS**

 **an** · **ti** · **the** · **sis** (n.)

 

* * *

 

 

I remember overhearing a conversation between two people when I was studying in the library one night and they were mostly chatting about the latest gossip circulating around school. Soon enough, their discussion turned to the dating scene in campus. I mostly tuned them out while I concentrated on writing notes for my English Literature assignment, until the girl said to her gay friend:

 

“Like, I don’t even know what Thor sees in him, to be honest. I mean, Laufeyson is totally the complete opposite of what Thor is.”

 

To which the guy replied: “I know, right?! Laufeyson thinks he’s too good for anyone that I’m actually surprised he’s dating Thor, to be honest.”

 

Hearing those words, I wanted to come out from behind the tall bookshelves that separated our study tables so I could give them a piece of my mind. But considering where I was at that moment, I didn’t want to get into any trouble for making a scene, especially when I was on the elderly librarian’s hit list.

 

Instead, I grabbed my things and bolted out of there as fast as I could so I would be able to clear my head. I walked the long distance from the college library back to my dorm building on the other side of the campus grounds. Along the way, I tried so hard to forget about what those two students said about you and me, but it was difficult knowing that this wasn’t the first time I was aware of what other people thought about me dating you.

 

I didn’t really understand why they had a problem with you being my boyfriend. I get that you’re not the most approachable person at first sight and you have very little patience for people with immature or homophobic attitudes, but they don’t see what I see in you.

 

They don’t see how you always challenge me to be the best that I can be on a mental capacity. You never make me feel intellectually inferior when I am with you, even though I know you can be so vicious around people who you consider as witless or whatever ten-dollar insult word you can come up with.

 

They don’t see how you are the only one outside of my mother who can calm me down whenever I get into a berserker rage if someone is stupid enough to offend either of us in public with their hateful bigotry. With just one firm touch of your hand and a steady look in your beautiful green eyes, it basically activates my off switch and I’m always grateful to you for that.

 

Most importantly, they don’t see how you just complete me in all the right ways despite our countless differences in so many things. We aren’t perfect, and we get into the most violent arguments like those dramatic scenes you see in movies or TV. But at the end of the day, we always find ways to make things work between us because we can’t imagine living the rest of our lives without each other.

 

You would surely scoff at me for being so sentimental like this, but I can’t help it.

 

It’s who I am. Much like you are who you are. You will always be this cold and intimidating person to people who aren’t part of you trusted circle of friends. You will always bitch at me for having no regard for high-maintenance grooming. You will forever judge me for my shameless love of Pop-Tarts, Coldplay, and Project Runway. We are so different that we might as well be living on different planets.

 

But I love you so much, and that’s all that matters. And by the time I reached my dorm room and found you sleeping peacefully on my bed, everyone’s negative opinion about us being together just fades away into oblivion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, this is unbetaed. So please forgive any and all mistakes.
> 
> Starting with this chapter, the updates will be as follows: Loki's entries will be posted on Mondays and Thor's entries will be published on Thursdays.
> 
> Comments are welcome, and thanks for reading!


	3. Brevity (Loki)

* * *

 

**BREVITY**

**bre** • **vi** • **ty** ( **n**.)

 

* * *

 

Your parents are coming in all the way from San Francisco and you get a text message from them saying that they’re already on their way to visit us in the Lower East Side walk-up apartment we just moved in after graduating from college.

 

Right. You have exactly fifteen minutes to make me come like a nasty pig slut, fix our appearance to look presentable for your folks, and make damn sure the place doesn’t smell of filthy gay sex before they arrive here from the airport.

 

You look at me with that feral grin plastered on your face, the front of your baggy crimson sweatpants already tenting with primal lust, your gloriously naked chest already flushing red with lust, and a shamelessly cavalier gleam in your hypnotic blue eyes as you close the distance between us in mere seconds.

 

Predictably, you could never back down from a challenge, even if that means only getting a very limited amount of time to get what I fucking want.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unbetaed. Please forgive me for any and all mistakes you might spot.
> 
> Comments are always welcome, and thanks for reading!


	4. Banal (Thor)

* * *

 

**BANAL**

**ba** · **nal** ( **n**.)

 

* * *

 

 

There came a point during our junior year in college when our relationship just reached a plateau of sorts.

 

It wasn’t that our love for each other had begun to fade, but I did notice that you had grown bored of the usual things we liked to do when we spent some quality time alone. You had this glazed look on your face whenever we watched movies in bed together or rolled your eyes in irritation whenever I suggested we go up to the roof of your dorm building to smoke pot and make out. Not even a trip to your favorite bookstore could snap you out of your weird funk.

 

Honestly, your behavior was beginning to scare me.

 

Over the years, I learned how to become more and more observant, especially when it came to gauging your ever-changing moods. I know for a fact that things would get ugly really quick if I didn’t do something to shake things up, and I was desperate to find a way to recharge our dimming spark.

 

It was pure luck that I heard from Steve, Bucky, and Natasha that Florence + The Machine—your favorite band in the whole world—was on tour and that they were holding a concert in Los Angeles right smack in the middle of spring break.

 

I didn’t even hesitate with my decision. I went online and purchased us VIP tickets for the concert and first-class round-trip flight tickets. It meant taking on overtime and extra shifts at Heimdall's cafe for God knows how long until I can pay off the expenses from my credit card, but I didn't care. After that, I called Tony and asked if we could possibly crash at his place in the Hollywood Hills for a few days, and he cheerfully agreed on the condition that we don’t leave cum stains on the bed sheets.

 

I remember the way you lit up with pure joy when I revealed to you my surprise getaway trip on the day before spring break. It was as if the past few months of seeing you so indifferent had never happened in the first place. And although I held some reservations that you would revert back to a cloudy mood when we arrived in L.A., I was relieved to discover that your happiness was sustained throughout our West Coast pilgrimage to see your red-haired music idol in action; a happiness that lasted for months after we came back to New York for the new semester.

 

You rewarded me with so much passion during that memorable spring break trip that it manifested as lovely red scratch marks all over my back and dark purple bite marks scattered across my chest.

 

The turning point for me came when I watched you having the time of your life singing and dancing to the band’s songs while I tried my best to keep up with your infectious energy. And I knew at that moment when you tightly held on to me piggyback during “You’ve Got The Love” that I would do everything it takes to always keep you in that state of bliss.

 

Because I would sooner hurl myself off a bridge than to let our relationship die a slow death by just going through the daily motions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unbetaed. Please forgive me for any and all mistakes you might spot.
> 
> Comments are always welcome, and thanks for reading!


	5. Criminal (Loki)

* * *

 

**CRIMINAL**

**cri**  ·  **mi**  · **nal** ( **n**.)

 

* * *

 

 

In retrospect, I knew I should have been more careful and discreet about the whole thing, but life has a way of screwing you over when you least expect it.

 

Once I was taken into custody at the police precinct, I immediately contacted my lawyer when I was cleared to have my one phone call and explained to her about my predicament and warned her not to breathe a single word about the situation to you. Amora hissed a stream of curses at my ear, but promised to be at the station in fifteen minutes before she abruptly hung up on me.

 

My irritation turned to a mixture of anger and fear when I saw you approach my holding cell beside my attorney.

 

Inwardly, I was pissed at the fact that Amora had the nerve to defy my orders about not telling you that I landed in jail.

 

I had difficulty looking at you directly because I knew you had that wounded look of disbelief and disappointment in your eyes whenever you know I was caught doing something reckless and irresponsible behind your back. Of all the years we have been together, that damn expression is the one thing I could never bring myself to face in any capacity.

 

Hours later, Amora pulled through with her vicious tenacity in dealing with the authorities and lowered my drug dealing charge into a minor misdemeanor offence where I would simply serve a substantial amount of hours performing community service and no jail time. Basically I was given a slap on the wrist considering this was my first time getting caught for breaking the law.

 

Oh, joy.

 

But in the end, those 96 hours of community service I got served as a bit of a blessed respite.

 

It gave me the opportunity to be away from your presence and being on the receiving end of your unbearably morose aura and your fucking kicked-puppy-dog expressions because of what I’ve done.

 

Throughout the duration of my punishment, I mentally justified that there was much worse things I could have done than getting caught for dealing cocaine on the side so I could earn some extra cash in order to compensate for my shitty low-paying job and keep up with our exorbitant lease and utility bills.

 

I could have spread my legs for money like a common whore and jeopardized my health in the process.

 

I could have been a very lethal assassin for hire and finally put my gun shooting skills to use.

 

I could have used all the dirty and filthy secrets I know about certain people I know and blackmailed them to within an inch of their pathetic lives so they can keep their skeletons locked firmly in the closet.

 

What ticks me off is the fact that you also seem to think that I’ve also been using coke on top of peddling that shit when you know for a fucking fact that I hate snorting things up my nose. There is a reason why marijuana is my only recreational drug of choice.

 

Aside from my justifications, I also wondered when exactly you’ll get over this issue so we can both move on with our lives.

 

Move on with a blank slate and forget.

 

Forget that I was so stupid to get caught.

 

Forget that I even decided to make money through illegal means in the first place.

 

Forget that I did all that because I fucking love you and wanted us both to survive on our meager post-college careers.

 

Just… forget everything and not think of me as a malicious antagonist in our lives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unbetaed. Please forgive me for any and all mistakes you might spot.
> 
> Comments are always welcome, and thanks for reading!


End file.
